Mother’s Day Grief

Before you ask random strangers if they are mothers, keep in mind:

Some people lost their mothers.

Some people are estranged from their mothers.

Some people don’t know their mother and were raised by relatives/foster family/etc.

Some people tragically miscarried (BUT they are STILL a parent.  If you die,  your mom is still a mom.  Don’t diminish the tragedy of a miscarried baby or a premature baby or stillborn.  They are PEOPLE.)

Some people are infertile.

Some people are trying to conceive.

Some people are trying to adopt, but can’t.

Some people lost their child to illness or accident.

Be sensitive to people who are hurting on this day and do NOT ask strangers if they are mothers. If they do have one of these issues, be sensitive and remember, even if a baby/fetus/child died, she is STILL a mother, regardless of how old her child was.

I’m blessed to still have my mother around and still have a relationship with her, but not everybody is.  I am blessed to have guardianship (not biological) of two adorable 3-year-olds.  Not everybody is, and even for me, the day can be sensitive. The twins spend the day with their biological family, as well as most holidays, a constant reminder that they are not ‘mine’ and will grow up knowing the truth about where they came from and why (a watered down, censored version of why).  

My heart goes out to people who have a tough time on Mother’s Day.  But it’s over. 


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